shamo: (Default)
Is it me? Do I smell?

How is it that about half of a cast can pull out on a show?

I don't understand.....
shamo: (Evil Homer)
Call centre setting - early afternoon.....

Phone: Ring ring.....

Me: picks up phone 'City of Melbourne this is Seamus'

Customer: 'Can you explain to me why Melbourne has a lord mayor that is Chinese and wasn't even born in Australia?'

Me: 'Because he was elected, sir.'

Customer: 'How was that allowed to happen - he's Chinese'

Me: 'He's an Australian Citizen, sir'

Customer: 'So some islamic Terrorist can become lord mayor, as long as they become a citizen, is that what you're saying?'

Me: 'I imagine someone with that kind of background would have trouble getting citizenship sir'

Customer: 'How was he elected twice?'

Me: 'People voted for him sir'

Customer: 'Who voted for him (Lord Mayor John So)'

Me: 'The residents of Melbourne sir'

Customer: 'What, all the Asian students who live in Melbourne then'

Me: 'No sir, the owners or ratepayers of the properties are the ones who vote'

Customer: 'So we sold half of Melbourne to Asians'

Me: 'I'm sorry sir, but I'm going to terminate this call, this is nonsense'.

Customer: Hangs up.....

I don't know why, but that really riled me up. I was furious at the world for a good 5 minutes after that call.....
shamo: (Cartman)
For some time now we've been looking at houses. As many of you know. I wanted to tell you about one of our less pleasant experiences.

So yeah the interaction with RUN goes a little something like this:
shamo: (Evil Homer)
Okay. This happened to me yesterday, pray it never happens to you.

I was out in the city, blowing my myer card on crap (got a nice shiny new keyboard and mouse kit - all logitech, all cordless, all sleek and cool looking). I'd been gone for under 2 hours, okay, and [livejournal.com profile] alleycat04 was out with me, because, well, I don't actually know, but I'll pretend it is because she likes my company and finds me irresistible. (yes it's a lie, but I like it).

So on rolls the day, a little under 2 hours later I come back home (it's about 12:40 or something) and low and behold, I hear the sound of someone having a shower. A loud shower, but a shower nonetheless.

So i make my way to the kitchen to get a glass of water (it was a hot day) and I am immediately hit by the cooling sound of flowing water from our in-built architectural water feature. Water was cascading gracefully down from the ceiling onto the kitchen and bathroom floor, splashing and creating an ambiance of calm and tranquility.

JESUS-TITTY-FUCKING.... Water was pouring, and I mean pouring, through our ceiling onto the floor downstairs. I had no idea where it was coming from at first, but I realised it must be from the bathroom upstairs. So up I went - and this greeted me:

Image hosted by Photobucket.com

Water was pissing out of the cistern, which had fallen clean off the wall. The problem was that, with the cistern on an angle, water poured out of it and the shut off mechanism (which relies on a flotie thing) leaves the inlet valve constantly open. So water was pouring out of it, and being constantly replaced by the inlet into the Cistern.

So what to do. Shut off the water mains. Oh yeah, that tap is buggered and won't actually shut off the water. Shit. Shut off the tap into the cistern. Okay - I squelch through the puddles. I get my hand on the tap, it's jammed as anything. I can't movie it with my hands, which are now wet themselves.

My only hope is my shifter. My big fuck off shiny shifter. Where the bollocks is the thing? Oh yeah, down stairs, under the water fall. Crap. I wade on through the water to get to the cupboard. It's not there.... crap crap crap. I find it on a random table. Get upstairs and get that tap moving. Once It's been unjammed it turns without protest. And so I shut off the source of the water....

Next thing I did was shut the power off. You see, the thing about water flowing through a floor and ceiling, is that it meets the light fittings in between. Water and electricity being the natural trouble-makers they are, I thought I'd best separate them.

Of course the stuff soaked through the floor takes some time to stop flowing..... But eventually it slows and stops. By this stage I've called the housemates, and gotten through to the Real Estate Agents 'emergency' paging service.

Nothing to do but wait. My staunch [livejournal.com profile] alleycat04 offers to go fetch a squeegee for me to get rid of the water. Besides, nature's calling, and my house can't help her anymore..... This is what needed sweeping:

Image hosted by Photobucket.com

So once that wait is over, I scrape the water out of the house.

2 hours or so pass. No call back from the 'emergency' paging service. The original message stated 'both bathrooms in the house are flooded' Hmmmmm..... Another hour passes so I leave another message - stating that this is my second message......

After a little while one of my housemates calls me for an update, and I tell him I got nothing..... So he asks for the number, and embellishes the story a bit (points out that the water is turned off at the mains, and the house is without power in the meantime - he gets a call back).

In the meantime, I've eskied what I can from the fridge, cleaned what I can of the floor, and generally twiddled my thumbs.... Man it's annoying.

So then I got the fuck out of the house because I was sick of it, and haven't been back untill I posted this post.

And now I'm angry, and determined not to stay here for too much longer. I work to hard and am paid to well to live in this shit.

News Flash

Dec. 28th, 2005 03:13 pm
shamo: (Evil Homer)
Power is back on at the old homestead - plumber should be done later on tonight (getting a new toilet cistern installed, and the dodgy pipe leaky thing that caused the problem is being sealed. Life shall return to normal soon - but the owner might be in deep bollocks because:
A.) the Agent was never even informed about the second bathroom
B.) we're pretty bloody sure that the guy they used was dodgy.
C.) The back section of the house may need re-wiring as a result of the water damage
D.) The back section of the house was wired dodgily to begin with - it appears 'Jerry' hasn't heard of a modern invention called 'insulation' for electrical wiring....
shamo: (Evil Homer)
Note to all would be plumbers out there (just got an update on the house situation). If you're going to work in a ceiling: DO NOT CUT A DRAIN PIPE AND PUT A BUCKET UNDERNEATH IT - I'll explain more later, but that's exactly what the dodgy mother-such-and-such who's 'done a lot of work on the house before' and 'knows the landlord' has done for us.

We got a sparky over at our place as we speak who discovered "Jerry's" handywork in the new bathroom - amazing what you find behind a suspended ceiling.....

I never thought I'd be in the middle of a current affair story....
shamo: (Manslaughter)
I'll fill you on the details later. But since a bit before one yesterday, my house has been without the luxury of:

Electricity
Water
Dry Floors
A dry first floor ceiling

And I'm none to happy about it. I work to hard and earn too much money to put up with Slum-share housing anymore....

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